The Love Boat

A/N: Who’s on first? Wait…wrong bit….

Disclaimer: I don’t own Chuck

Then [redacted] *author’s note. Roan has assured me I am in fact, WAY to young to know where this is

“Everyone, stop,” Sarah said. “We need to focus on the important part.” Chuck and Carina nodded in agreement, while Roan sat there, the amused smile still on his face. “Chuck asked you an important question, Carina. Why?”

The grin on Roan’s face grew, but what shocked Sarah the most was Carina.

Carina looked pleased. Beyond pleased. “Because of that,” she answered. “Blondie, we’ve been through it all. This is the first time I’ve ever seen you look like that at anyone. This is the first time I’ve ever seen you care like that about anyone, and God do you care.”

“Carina is right,” Roan agreed. “You care.” He shook his head. “Terrible attribute for a spy.”

“Why?” Chuck asked. “Why is it bad to care?” He held up his hand. “Why are you doing this job if you don’t care. Why shouldn’t you care about the people you are protecting. Otherwise, you’re a mercenary.” He turned to Carina. “And I don’t believe that you don’t care.” He turned to Roan. “You either.”

“Charles,” Roan began.

“No,” Chuck said, cutting him off. “You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t care. You obviously are on a different mission.” He looked back at Carina. “When she called, you came; you didn’t have to.”

“You just answered your own question, Chuckles,” Carina said gently. “You saw through all our bluster and bullshit, and you saw the woman.”

Carina’s softer expression vanished, instantly replaced by a wicked, predatory smirk as she decided to test his newfound confidence.

She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table, her eyes raking over him.

“Of course, seeing the woman and knowing what to do with her are two very different things. She’s a lethal weapon, Chuckles. Are you sure a sweet, innocent civilian has the stamina to keep up with a spy? Or do you need me to draw you a diagram?”

Sarah's eyebrows rose.

Roan's amused smile widened.

Normally, this would have been the exact moment Chuck would blush furiously, wave his hands, and babble out a string of panicked apologies.

Instead, Chuck flinched for half a second.

He took a calm sip of his drink, set it down, and met Carina's gaze with a steady look.

“I’m a computer engineer, Carina,” Chuck said. “I specialize in mastering complex systems. I know how to read the code, find the hidden pathways, and keep the hardware running all night without overheating.”

Carina's smirk faltered.

Chuck's smile grew just slightly.

“So no, I definitely don't need a diagram.”

He paused.

“I already have full administrative privileges.”

Roan practically choked on his drink, a delighted bark of laughter escaping his chest.

Carina's jaw actually dropped for a fraction of a second.

It was glorious.

Sarah felt a sudden rush of pride.

Her husband had just taken Carina's favorite game, calmly flipped it around, and beaten her at it using computer terminology.

She couldn't stop the smile.

Carina recovered, narrowing her eyes at him.

“You've been holding out on me.”

“I didn't know we were competing,” Chuck replied.

“We are now.”

Chuck nodded solemnly.

“Okay.”

Carina stared at him.

“That's it?”

“What should I say?”

“I don't know. Sentences spiraling out of control.”

Chuck shrugged.

“I married Sarah. I'm getting used to women messing with me, just a skosh.”

Sarah's eyes widened.

Carina looked offended.

Roan laughed again.

Sarah leaned into Chuck, resting her chin on his shoulder, and gave Carina a profoundly satisfied smile.

“He's right,” she said softly.

Her hand slid down Chuck's chest and came to rest on his thigh.

“His technical support is absolutely unparalleled.”

Chuck swallowed.

Sarah's smile became just a little more wicked.

“And let me tell you…”

She leaned closer to his ear.

“His typing speed isn't the only thing he has incredibly fast fingers for.”

Chuck's eyes closed.

Carina stared at them.

“Okay.”

She held up both hands.

“I officially regret asking.”

Sarah sat back, looking entirely too pleased with herself.

Chuck opened his eyes.

“I think I handled that pretty well.”

Sarah kissed his cheek.

“You did.”

She looked at Carina.

“Very well.”

Carina pointed at Chuck.

“He's trouble.”

Sarah smiled.

“He's learning.”

Chuck grinned.

“I have an excellent teacher.”

Roan shook his head.

“I believe we may have created a monster.”

Sarah looked at Chuck, her smile softening.

“No.”

She squeezed his hand.

“We just let him out of his cage.” And added right after, “He saw all of me.” She looked at Chuck. “Not to make it sound weird, but he saw the eight-year-old girl in me.” Chuck didn’t know what to say.

Cause it sounded a little weird.

“Nope, I’m giving you a pass on that one, Chuckles,” Carina told him. “That was weird.”“It was a little weird,” Chuck agreed.“Damn it, it sounded good in my head,” Sarah muttered.

“We know the intent,” Roan said gently. “Please never say that again.”“But, Agent Walker never makes that mistake,” Carina pointed out. “Sarah does.”

Sarah looked down at their joined hands.

“I’m too honest around him,” she admitted.

Chuck turned toward her.

“You don't have to be anything around me.”

Sarah looked back at him.

He wasn't teasing.

He wasn't trying to make her feel better.

He simply meant it.

“You don't have to be Agent Walker,” he continued softly. “You don't have to be perfect, or careful, or have the right answer every time. You can just be Sarah, my Sarah.”

Something in her expression changed.

Carina saw it.

Roan saw it.

“Chuck seemed to be the only person in the room who didn't realize he'd reached straight through all of Sarah Walker's defenses and found Sarah Bartowski waiting underneath.”

Sarah squeezed his hand.

“You make that very easy.”

He smiled.

“Good.”

She looked at him for a moment longer.

“I don't think anyone has ever made it feel safe to be Sarah.”

Chuck's smile softened.

“Well…”

He glanced down at their hands.

“I'm your Chuck.”

Sarah's eyes warmed.

“That sounds like a pretty good reason.”

Carina watched the two of them for a moment and shook her head.

“This is disgustingly sweet.”

Sarah smiled.

“You're just jealous.”

“Absolutely.”

Roan chuckled.

“Back to the topic, the mistakes make you vulnerable,” Chuck said, nodding, suddenly getting it. “Your greatest weapon…it is also your greatest strength.”

Roan nodded sagely. “But, how is that not true in everything?” Chuck asked.

“It’s the stakes,” Carina said gently. “It could be our lives. It’s not a game.”

“Well, no one is touching her or doing unspeakable things to her,” Chuck said, as forcefully as he could muster.

He realized his mistake as soon as he said it.

Carina raised one eyebrow.

He turned to Sarah for help when he saw the smile on her face.

He looked over at Roan who was chuckling.

“You all know what I mean,” Chuck said softly.

“Can’t get it up?” Carina asked.

“He can,” Sarah said. “Oh?” Roan said, enjoying the back and forth.

“We haven’t done anything, because we keep getting interrupted,” Sarah pointed out.

“Then how do you know?” Carina asked.

“You damn well know how,” Sarah replied.

“We should stop, or he might die,” Carina said.

Sarah was shocked. She had never seen Carina show restraint. She looked at Chuck, and the color that was on his face….it was indescribable.

“She doesn’t seem to be complaining about anything,” Carina added, trying to help. The color intensified.

Chuck cleared his throat.

“I would like to point out that I am still in the room.”

Carina nodded.

“We know.”

“That seems like something you should take into consideration.”

“I did.”

“How?”

Carina smiled.

“I decided it was more fun this way.”

Chuck looked at Sarah.

“You're supposed to be helping me.”

Sarah gave him an innocent smile.

“I am.”

“How?”

“I haven't said anything.”

Chuck stared at her.

“That is not the same thing.”

Sarah leaned closer.

“I could.”

His eyes widened.

“Please don't.”

Carina looked at Roan.

“He's learning.”

Roan nodded.

“Quickly.”

Chuck sighed.

“I married into this.”

“That should be studied,” Roan said, truly fascinated.

“Let’s talk about the ones that are in the brig,” Sarah said, trying to redirect the conversation.

While she had no problem teasing Chuck, the others…they were not allowed.

“A beautifully put together plan, if I may say so myself,” Roan said, quite pleased with himself.

“Roan put roofies in my drink, made sure the Captain was nearby, yelled for him, got the two away from me, and in the scuffle, slipped the drugs in their pockets. Both men are under arrest for attempted sexual assault.”

“And why are you here?” Sarah asked, turning to Roan.

“My old friend Captain Stubing, and I get the humor in it,” Roan began. “Got tired of these gun runners and other criminals running the town. He was looking for someone to see if they could find anyone to help him. I had some vacation time and took it.”

“You have friends?” Carina asked.

“Have you told them what the captain suggested?” Roan countered.

“Oh, the captain is concerned for my safety and wondered if I shouldn’t stay with you two tonight,” Carina said, turning back to Chuck and Sarah, just as Chuck’s skin was beginning to turn back to a normal shade.

“No,” Sarah replied, swiftly and emphatically.

Carina blinked.

“No?”

“No.”

“You didn't even think about it.”

“I didn't need to.”

Carina looked at Chuck.

“Chuck?”

He opened his mouth.

Sarah looked at him.

He closed it.

Carina smiled.

“Smart man.”

“I was going to say that we have a perfectly good cabin.”

Carina nodded.

“Yes.”

She looked at Sarah.

“And apparently a very busy one.”

Sarah's eyes narrowed.

“Carina.”

“What?”

“Don't.”

“I didn't say anything.”

“You were about to.”

Carina looked at Chuck.

“Was she always this easy to read?”

Chuck glanced at Sarah.

“Not until recently.”

Sarah's eyebrows rose.

“Excuse me?”

Chuck immediately realized his mistake.

“I meant—”

Carina laughed.

“Oh, I like him.”

Sarah smiled despite herself.

“I know.”

Carina turned to Roan.

“Roomie?”

Roan's chuckle was low and thoroughly amused.

“I suspect you already know the answer.”

Carina looked back at the couple.

“Fine. I'll find another room.”

Sarah relaxed.

“Thank you.”

Carina held up a finger.

“But if I hear anything through the wall—”

Sarah's eyes widened.

“You won't.”

Chuck's face turned bright red.

Carina grinned.

“Oh, I absolutely believe you.”

Roan shook his head.

“Perhaps we should leave them to their privacy.”

Carina nodded.

“Probably.”

She looked at Chuck one last time.

“But for the record, Chuckles…”

He swallowed.

“Yes?”

“I'm impressed.”

Chuck blinked.

“With what?”

Carina smiled.

“Whatever you did to make Sarah this happy.”

Sarah's expression softened immediately.

Chuck looked at his wife.

“So am I.”

}o{

Chuck was watching the ocean, the moon bouncing off of it. He loved her; she loved him. That wasn’t the hard part.

Four men were after her. That wasn’t even the hard part.

The hard part was: was this too much?

It wasn’t just being together. He wanted to be with her. He was quite sure she wanted to be with him.

If they were…they were husband and wife. He looked down at the ring on his finger and smiled.

He nearly jumped as two hands slid around his waist.

“Ma’am, I’m a happily married man,” he said.

“Are you?”

He spun in her arms. There wasn’t teasing on her face. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“I should be asking you that,” Sarah said.

“Well, I tried talking to the booby over there,” Chuck began.

“Booby?” Sarah asked, amusement on her face.

“Yes, that is its proper name,” Chuck replied. “I might have named it Paulie.”

“Why Paulie?” Sarah asked.

“No idea,” Chuck admitted. “I was telling him of what I was thinking, and he was less helpful than Edward.”

“It’s hard to find good birds nowadays,” Sarah replied, sagely nodding her head.

“He thinks I’m talking to the wrong person,” Chuck said with a shrug.

“Carina would have said you’re talking to the wrong booby,” Sarah pointed out.

He couldn’t help but laugh, and loved the smile on her face. “Hey,” she said softly. “Talk to me.”

“Some would say what we’re considering doing is irresponsible,” Chuck began.

“I agree,” Sarah replied, making Chuck’s eyes go wide. “We probably never should have brought Carina on board. And I can’t prove it, but I think she has a thing for older men.”

Chuck laughed and shook his head. “I thought you told me that other guys said you weren’t funny.”

“I did,” Sarah told him.

“Sarah, no offense, but I think you dated douchebags,” Chuck said as gently as possible.

“I know I did,” Sarah told him.

She smiled at him.

“And apparently I had terrible taste.”

Chuck gave her a small smile.

“Had?”

Sarah's eyebrow went up.

“Don't push your luck, husband.”

“Yes, ma'am.”

She took his hand.

“But that's not the problem.”

Chuck's expression softened.

“No?”

“No.”

She looked down at their joined hands, then back at him.

“I think I know what the problem is.”

He started to speak, and she held up her hand. “Let me say this. I think I know what the problem is. I think there’s something that we both want to happen.”

“Not to know what Roan and Carina are doing?” Chuck offered.

Sarah laughed softly.

“No.”

Chuck thought for a second.

“Then maybe there are two somethings.”

Sarah's smile grew.

“Yes.”

She stepped a little closer.

“Two somethings we both want.”

Chuck looked into her eyes.

“And we're both pretending we're not talking about them.”

“I think we've spent enough time beating around the bush.”

He swallowed.

“That's a very dangerous thing for you to say to me.”

Sarah's smile became just a little wicked.

“I know.”

She squeezed his hand.

“And this time, I don't want to pretend.”

Chuck smiled.

“Good.”

Sarah leaned closer.

“Very good.”

He took her hands in his and held them. “I would agree, but I was told those things are supposed to be unspeakable.”

“Oh that is not fair,” Sarah said. “That is my line.”

“Socks to be you,” Chuck said, his lips twitching.

“That was awful,” Sarah told him.

“It was,” Chuck admitted.

“You’re a guy who makes bad puns,” Sarah told him. “That is something you should have disclosed before we married.”“So we’re divorcing?”

“I’m not,” Sarah said, holding his gaze. She watched him swallow. “Fine, I’ll say it. We probably are going way too fast, but we are where we are. I love you. I finally found you, and you want me to get an annulment?”

“I didn’t say I wanted an annulment,” Chuck pointed out.“Fine, it was a general you,” she corrected. “These people.”

“That think we’re going to fast?” Chuck asked for clarification.“Correct,” Sarah told him.

“And what do you want?” Chuck asked.

“To be your wife, take you down to our cabin, LOCK the door-”

“Are there any spy locks?” Chuck asked.

She blinked. “What?”

“You know, do you have any super secret locks we could put on the door?”

“Chuck…that’s not a thing,” Sarah told him gently.

“That’s what a spy would say,” he countered.

She couldn’t stop the grin on her face. “I’m starting to understand why Edward judges you the way he does,” she admitted.

“Oh, are you now judging me?”

“No,” she said softly. “I said I was starting to understand, not that I was agreeing.”

She squeezed his hands. “I could give a Princess Bride quote, but I’d rather just say this plainly. I spent my whole life not even knowing you existed, and wouldn’t have dared dream you did because you are more than I could ever hope for. I found you. Not only did I find you, but you have done everything in your power to help me in a quite ridiculous situation, and I fall harder for you each day. So, no. I do not want an annulment, I do not want a divorce. I want to go downstairs, and consummate this marriage.”“I-I like this plan,” Chuck agreed, struggling with words.

She leaned in. “And, if you need some help or are struggling, I am glad to take our time and go slow.”

“Jesus,” he choked out.

“I should… I should probably stretch,” Chuck babbled, his brain completely abandoning ship. “Hydrate. Maybe do some light calisthenics. Is there a waiver I need to sign?”

Sarah’s laugh was warm, husky, and entirely genuine. The grin on her face was predatory, but her eyes were incredibly soft. “No waivers, Chuck. But I highly recommend the stretching.” She trailed her fingers lightly down his chest. “Because I believe practice makes perfect, and we are going to practice until we have perfect practice.”

“As you wish,” he blurted out, wondering if a man could literally die from anticipation.

She stopped.

She stared at him.

“I need you to be sure.”

“Oh, I'm sure!” he said as quickly as possible. “Scared, worried, some anxiety, I don’t think I’m having any performance issues-”

“Chuck,” she said gently.

“I’m sure.”

She smiled at him and he thought he had never seen a more beautiful site in the world.

}o{

Now

“So, your husband’s performance on the ship?” Graham asked, making notes.

“Perfect,” Sarah said. She looked over and he was turning a certain color she loved.She looked back to Graham.

“Absolutely perfect.”

Graham stopped writing.

“I meant operational performance.”

Sarah looked at him.

“I know.”

Chuck covered his face with one hand.

Graham stared at them.

“I am asking about the mission.”

“Of course,” Sarah said.

Graham waited.

Sarah smiled.

“He performed well above expectations.”

Graham slowly put his pen down.

“You are doing this deliberately.”

Sarah's smile grew.

“It’s a perfect assessment.”

Chuck looked at her.

“Performed above expectations?”

She glanced at him.

“Maybe more than above.”

Graham picked up his pen again.

“I miss when reports contained useful information.”

Chuck muttered, “I think that might still be useful information.”

Graham looked at him.

“Please stop helping.”

Graham opened his bottom desk drawer, bypassed the extra pens and the aspirin, and pulled out a bottle of scotch and a single glass. "I am the Director of the Central Intelligence Agency," Graham said to the room at large, pouring a generous measure. "I have toppled regimes. I have stared down the KGB. And yet, I am currently being forced to listen to a honeymoon review masquerading as a debriefing."

"Technically, sir," Chuck offered, "the CIA did refund the honeymoon."

Graham drank the scotch in one gulp. "If you speak again, Bartowski, I will have you dropped over international waters."

A/N: She gonna kill that boy. He’s gonna go with a smile on his face.